Making Peace with the Past

This article appeared in the September 2004 issue of Spirited Solutions’ E-Newsletter.

Have you ever browsed one of the internet dating sites and marveled at the number of “lonely hearts” out there? Our society offers “coupledom” as one of the panaceas of a number of modern ills, and it is both idealized and idolized in our culture.

Many people end one relationship and then immediately begin another, attached like Velcro to the new object of their affections. They don’t take the necessary time to examine the relationship, what did and didn’t work and why it ended. More importantly, they don’t take the time to forgive themselves and their former partner.

Recently, I’ve found myself doing extensive forgiveness work. It’s not been fun; in fact, it’s never fun. Yet each time I forgive (and some individuals I have to forgive over and over!), I feel better, lighter, happier, and more whole.

Only when we forgive are we freed to be in the kindest sort of relationships with ourselves, the Divine, and others. Forgiveness doesn’t have to be elaborate—It can be as simple as affirming, “I, Barnsley, forgive __________ for any hurt, real or imagined, s/he may have caused me.” But forgiveness does need to be felt, and that is why it is best attempted with a witness, another person who can help you hold the space for forgiveness and support you as difficult feelings come up during the process.

In fact, when I facilitate powerful forgiveness sessions for clients, they experience a release of long-held emotions! Most clients also report that within a few days, one of the people they have long been troubled by contacts them and the interaction is positive—Those we forgive feel the change too! They are freed by our forgiveness work, but most importantly, we are freed by doing it!

Who would you like to forgive? Let Spirited Solutions™ help you do this challenging but rewarding work. You will see a dramatic, positive shift in your life in just two sessions focused on forgiveness.
Why don’t you give yourself the gift of forgiveness! Isn’t it time to make peace with your past and be free to live (joy)fully in the present???